Extra time?

Right now, there are some conflicts between my web life, sim life and my real life. Why can't all my persona get along? They're all fighting for the same cause: 30 hour days !

Imagine what you could do with 6 extra hours each day! I know that I would:

• spend real time with my family (by real, I mean enjoyable, not task-oriented time);
• write a clever blog entry with real content, every day;
• go through my reader ( I just started using Google reader; I was just a blog hopper going from one to another to another before. I had maybe 10 blogs that I really loved and never missed. I typed in their address by hand... The rest was whatever I found in the time I had. Now, with the reader, it is easier to follow stories and people but god, I've never seen so much bold numbers... Hey, I could also try to think of something to say and delurk once in a while-- now, I'm just a r.a.p.i.s.t.);
• finish a book (I started the The Sword of Truth series recently. I'm only at book 3 ; there are 172 of them, or so. This is something that should make me happy as I hate to "leave" characters at the end of a book, movie, tv show... Once a character has a life in my head, I will follow him/her forever. Even if its vessel turns bad. So looong series are a big plus in my book but there are so many words just waiting to be read. It feels almost daunting...);
• shake those trees and find a third piano ( Blame him. I play Animal crossing now. No, I do not why it's so addictive; I do not understand the goal of this game. Yet, I can't stop);
• do something other than sitting on a chair ( thank god my ass still fits on a chair... but I really need to get myself moving, or else I'll get stuck...).

6 extra hours, 6 bullets. Oh, and I guess I would want some extra sleep as well... Should I aim for 36-hour days?

Outsider's trading tip

I'm doing my part for the world economy. I'm investing large amount of money into acetaminophen and ibuprofen; you should expect a rise in the stock value for these.

I'm also doing my part for the family budget as I 'm looking for DIY lobotomy kit. Maybe if I take out the three spots in my brain which are killing me, everything would be better? Maybe my brain elfs are just playing World Tour in there. Thus the pain. I must excuse them (training mode, I guess?)

Speaking of excuses, you will forgive the fact that I didn't really post this yesterday, will you?

Silent Sunday #2

8 years old picture

House of mirrors

Is reading back your blog posts like looking in a mirror? Is blogging about that like filming yourself in a photo booth? And can a picture of that create an infinite loop? Or is that the recipe for dark matter...

At least, I'm wearing a nice shirt

Stolen

I had this post planned out where I would describe what I would miss if something got stolen. I had trouble to think of anything. Material things we could easily replace with money from our insurance. In some case, we would even get something better (somebody steal my old home computer, please!).

Things with sentimental value? I can hardly think that they would be worth anything to anyone else... Pictures that are not in electronic format? that might be hard to part with... or would it? It is not the pictures themselves, it's the memories behind the pictures that I treasure. And you can't steal that away from me.

I was feeling all happy at my sudden Zen-like attitude. Then I learned that my beloved earth grand-mother is having a hard time remembering simple things. Like the last time she visited us. Or that she even ever came to our house...

My beloved grand-mother.

And then I was not Zen. Not at all.

Break-in and cleaning policy

Yesterday morning, I notice that my next door neighbors' door was open. My sluggish morning mind was like hummm, something's strange because:

1. it was 5:30AM;
2. there was a snow storm outside ( inside snow storm are rare, even in Canada);
   
3. the neighbors are away on vacation until Friday.

So we ended up calling the police. By we, I mean my problem-solver of a husband. Two cops were patched to our neighbors' house, went inside and came back with good news -- nothing seems misplaced and/or missing. "They are very clean persons and everything seems perfect inside!" they said.

My overly (not) positive mind did a double take there. Ok, let's play "A day in your shoes". What if our situations were reversed? The neighbors called the police because the door to our unattended house was left open... What would they say? "For sure, there was a break-in; we can't hardly step in, there's crap all over the place?!"

Let me add that to my list of earth life lessons:

1. Wear clean underwear in case of an accident;
2. Always clean your house in case of a (almost) break-in;
3. (still open)
   

Lessons are fun when nobody gets hurt. Hypothetical misadventures are just just calling for what ifs. If thieves broke into your house, what's the worse thing they could steal? What would you miss the most?

Yesterday in one word

In the grand fashion of the Outburst board game, let me give you a list of ten synonyms to describe yesterday :

1. Advil
2. Tylenol
   
3. Anacin
4. Motrin
   
5. Aleve
6. Bayer's
7. Exedrin
8. Phenaphen
9. Nuprin
10. Empirin

In this new word game, pleonasms are highly appreciated. Translated in real life, I would like any (and every) combination from the 10 above.

Earth things I do not understand

I know they are not all over earth but they are quite frequent around my North American coordinates:

4-way stops!

Mea culpa here, yes, I will shamelessly admit that I am one of the drivers you hate. The one who hesitates, waits too long, goes in then slows down just to make sure it really was my turn... Let me try to explain my difficulties.

Four-way stop

I get the who gets there first rule. I'm a little bit confused with the who decides who got there first rule. The one on the right rule is supposed to take over, right? Let's assume for now that I always remember what the one on the right is supposed to do (go or yield??). Let's also go back to my amazing four-way diagram above and

1. shed a tear for my aborted artistic career ( now you know why);
2. assume it's traffic time. There are cars all over the intersection and cars behind them and so on...

Car A want to go toward Car C; Car C wants to go towards A. So they both go at the same time. Now it's time for B and D. Should they each want to go straight, then there is no problem. If D wants to go towards B but B want to go to its left towards A then there is a little problem. As it wants to cross over the D's "lane", I would assume that it would go after D, BUT while it goes, it completely stop the traffic for all cars. Say there is a D2 car waiting with the intention of going towards C. It would go at the same time as B. Now A2 and C2 have been waiting for three cars, they both want to go. Say they both want to go to their left? Are you as confused as me by now?

I think about those things. I'm not the only one. Yep, I'm complication #1 in Jim Loy's drivers' IQ test.

If you would like to know when I'm on the road (so that you're not), drop me a line.

Mathematician

Yep, that's been my cover story in the last 10 revolutions around the sun or so. That's not my real title but earthlings do know about maths, even if most try to avoid it like lice (Haven't you heard? the generic plague has been outranked as a calamity...). My real title? No soul knows what it means. If I say that I'm into Science and a Methodologist, wouldn't you think I'm friend with Tom Cruise?

I'm not going to go into the details -- let's just say that I scribble Greek letters a lot, I program even more, I teach some and I spend the remaining part of my work days explaining my job title.

Maths was not supposed to be my job. My 2-year college degree (CEGEP) is actually in Arts with a major in cinema. At the time, that was my career choice and math was my hobby. Ok, now I know how this sounds... I blame my martian DNA -- the finer distinctions between work and hobby were quite fuzzy on Mars. I eventually realized the errors of my way and flip-flop Maths and Arts in my Life schedule...

i love my job; make good money; have great working conditions.

Not trying to brag, I'm just trying to convince myself ( and courier in the computer voice font-- you create a loop and repeat ad nauseam.) I'm going back to work tomorrow and I'm dreading it. Can I flip-flop back? I'd rather see a movie tomorrow at 7:30AM... anyone wants to give me money for that?

Silent Sunday #1

The Green Snowman

Shhh! No words here, it's silent...

Current location

Yesterday was a post about where I'm from. Today's about where I am. Currently living at latitude 45° 29' North and longitude 75° 40' West (AKA Gatineau). I work in reputably "boring" Ottawa.

Ottawa from Gatineau

Truthfully, Ottawa does have a few strikes against her... but I used (in)famous quote marks for a reason. Maybe the first impression you get from a city :

1. mostly filled with politicians,
   
2. ...and government workers,
   
3. where everything close as soon as the sun is down,

is rather bland but you have to consider:

1. recent politicians have created the best soapish drama available off cable,
2. yours truly is a government employee (at least that's my current cover story. Granted, this might not have a lot of weight right now but wait until you know me better... :-)
3. darkness is scary ( or at least brings in the funny; 2 points for you if you get the reference without using the link).

My Using Quote Point is that boredom is in the eye of the "bebored". There's always something strange and/or interesting to find if you know where to look. (Or should I say how to look). At worse, get yourself a

1. a well-stocked liquor cabinet;
2. a boredness-repellent husband/wife/partner;
3. a new attitude;
4. all of the above.
   

Earth Assignment

Let me fill you in on my earth assignment so far. "So far" meaning close to 35 revolutions around the sun. I was to pass as a earthling infant in a small eastern township city located at Latitude 45° 24' North and Longitude 71° 54' West.

Google map rules your world

I was to infiltrate the Lise and Jacques couple and pass as their kid. The couple part didn't last long but the infiltration was nonetheless a success. Both targets were very eager to accept their role as parent and did a fine job. This part of the assignment was easy for me as not only do I have physical resemblance to both of them but my earthling mind and personality can also be considered as a mash of theirs. Of course, there are some incongruities in my character. Mom and Dad might have had some light suspicions as some point or another that I was from Mars but never any concrete proofs. My quirks were said to be part of my charm... thus my mission was safe.

Baby Susie, just before the antenna grew in

I spend most of my time with Mom as she was my primary guardian. I did get to experience a novelty back then to have parents who were separated. Seems much more common now. What is still a uniqueness is to have divorced/separated parents who still get along. Mine always did, and I am very grateful for that. (I went to the office between Christmas and New Year. Overheard some awful awful stories of Holiday visitation schedules between battling exes and children caught in the middle... Sad, sad, sad. )

In my day-to-day life/assignments, I tend to complain a lot... or so I'm told. I am sure I'll get to show this side of me here soon enough. In the meantime, it felt like a good idea to start slowly with a very generic introduction... I'll be back soon ( please don't do the Austrian accent... I added the "soon" to make sure you didn't).

Hello world

New year is supposed to mean new resolutions... Should I "resolute" to blog this year? God knows I could find more traditional objectives. Should I stress less or step to the fore more? ( resolution No 1 : no more rhymes). Could I use to shed a few pounds? Sure, who wouldn't after Christmas. But where's the fun in that...

I've seen the 365 challenges last year and thought that was an interesting concept. Can I commit to that? Of course not. I can barely commit to finish this post. I still need something to aim for though. I'll go with 192 posts for the year. In my workplace, 192 is the number of days in a year where we are actually supposed to work-work. Seams low but once you remove week-ends, vacations, holidays, sick days, don't feel like it days* it is a pretty accurate number.

* Ok, the plural here is just wishful thinking. We only have 1 "don't feel like it day" at work, and DFLI is not the official name used by HR ( but it should be, don't you think?). As with any (almost) unplanned paid time off, this day is always the best...

Three paragraphs in and I am already confused-- where was I going with this? Oh yeah, I will blog. I still have 191 posts this year to let you know who I am, how I chose my blog name and most importantly why people around me like to know in advance when I am driving. If this gets boring, just sit down and enjoy a nice cup of blueberry tea.